The Social Workers Visit

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Two social workers arrived on Wednesday 4th February .

The day Thomas Rawnsley’s life support machine was switched off, just a few miles away.

The day he died in enforced ‘independent’ living.

The adult social services lady,  and our social worker.

We didn’t know why they were coming.

Issy was not in a good mood amidst cleaning, and tidying.

I now have the wonderful help of local family support group, who I googled.

Angel Eyes, a lovely lady, who has supported an autistic girl, a similar age to Issy.

I do not feel judged by her, nor does she watch everything I do, and she treats me like a human being.

I see genuine concern, in her eyes.

She also cleans more, and better.

My stress is relieved by all this, and I know, this is the support Issy needed, for so long.

A breath of fresh air.

And most of all,  independent, or so I thought.

The social workers arrive at 1.30 .

Issy is  in a better mood… I am beyond relief.

A skip had arrived that morning.

My husband came back from work.

We put Issy’s old bed and mattress, outside for the past 3 months, due to a warm car, snow, and  not wanting it to put Issy off walking out.

We offer the social workers a drink.

Angel  eyes has been replaced by another nice lady from the new support, and she attends the meeting in our kitchen.

They ask if they can see Issy in her bedroom.

I say probably better, if we hold the meeting first, and see if she comes in for juice, so she initiates the meeting .

They agree.

And ask what Issy eats.

I say anything, and go to fridge, and show them the large chicken pies, which are currently her favourite.

I tell them what she ate yesterday, and say she doesn’t eat much during the day, maybe crackers and cheese, or toast.

Issy comes in for juice.

I get it.

On seeing the social workers Issy wets herself.

They notice.

The social worker asks me what am   I going to do about it.

I say, change her

And go and get new knickers and trousers.

Issy puts them on in her bedroom.

I resume the meeting.

Meanwhile, the lady form the support agency I found informs them of the facilities, and help they can offer Issy.

Issy comes in saying ‘coffee’.

I give her the decaffe.

They talk to her.

She ignores them.

She drinks her coffee in the kitchen.

She goes back into her bedroom shouting coffee, I jump up towards the kettle, she looks at me doing this, through the glass kitchen door, she says shut the door, I say shut the door, and she does.

This is her standard ritual.

The adult services social worker, asks if she drinks coffee, after coffee.

I say, ‘no that is just a mantra’.

So, ‘she does it for comfort’, she replies.

‘No’.

‘Then why does she do it ?’

‘Because she is autistic.’

They ask does Issy have clothes, should she want to go out.

I show them the new coat I bought for the purpose, they ask if she has proper shoes, I show her the boots she used to go out in, and the treds underneath.

The social worker asks what size her feet are.

I refer to the fact, that all these clothes, were given to the Lodge Lady, three weeks ago, and she had taken photos of them, on her iPad.

And Issy had been dressed in them, only two weeks before, on the road with me and the lodge lady, set for a walk, when frightened back by some giggling girls.

She replies they have to see them for themselves.

I say Issy read 6 pages of her Keyword book the Tuesday before, on the sofa in the lounge, before we waited outside for the nice affable lady, who didn’t turn up.

I tell them I videoed it.

They ask if they can watch, but I can’t get into the clip.

I offer to email it, but can’t as the LA has a firewall.

They ask about Issy’s bed, has it got springs sticking out.

I say they were never sticking out, but one could be felt, as she had worn down the mattress by banging up and down.

When I noticed it, I had turned the mattress over to the good side.

And then a day later, pulled out the guest bed underneath, pulled it up, and she used that for a month, and then we replaced it by a single bedded divan we had in another room.

This had now been her bed for the past 2 months.

The information for this concern, I assumed , was a comment from the trainee social worker to me in October about the matress, which I had responded to, in front of her, by picking the mattress up and turning it over.

The next week, the same worker had seen Issy sleeping on the brand new assembled the guest bed, and the mattress outside.

Thankfully, we delayed the skip, and the mattress was clearly visible with no springs sticking out, for them to inspect.

I must take a photograph before it is removed.

They then ask if the bed in the skip was the same one…….

They inspect the bathrooms, and go into see Issy in her bedroom.

They are back again next week, and weekly, for how long, we do not know.

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9 Comments

    1. How do you function with this sort of unbelievable bullying from the people who should be helping you and Issy? It is cruel beyond words. I would be on my knees under the pressure you and your family are going through. Thank god you are made of sterner stuff.

      Reply

  1. Oh for goodness sake Finola, what an earth are they trying too insinuate (don’t answer I already know) you are a fantastic mum, and you should be treated with the utmost respect. The questioning is just terrible, do they ask parents who don’t have special needs questions like this? The question would be a fat NO! I am so sorry that you and your family are being treated in such an awful manner. Instead of judging you, why not help support in the way that is best for Issy and all of you as a family, you live with this so are the expert.

    Love and hugs Soph xxx

    Reply

    1. I’m so sorry Finola what you are going through is just horrific, you don’t need to say can already imagine the hell you are being put through. So very unfair, so wish I could help in some way, this really should not be happening to you or any other parent. Issy is your daughter and as such you should be allowed to care for her no matter how old she is. I find it truly heartbreaking that this is being done to Issy, you and your family.
      Why is no one there to help you fight Issy’s corner and how and why is this allowed to continue? Issy is a human being not a toy!

      Sending hugs and love Finola xxxxxx

      Reply

    2. I have just moved from Sara’s blog to yours, so I can go into much more detail now and stop using Sara’s space. More to follow soon

      Reply

  2. Your ordeal seems like something out of Stalin’s Russia. This is democratic Britain isn;t it? What on earth has happened to this country when the powers that be can be so secretive and controlling.

    Reply

    1. This is third way, end justifies means ie money made from stitch up, truth is irrel politics. It started with Blair..

      We all now live in fear in totalitarian UK. there IS NO RULE of law, if I want to expose all this scandal, I would have to go to the Cof A, and risk the SS bankrupting costs, and even possibly court costs, if I lose, which because of the law being so vague, and burden balance of probabilities I could.

      So billions can now be made out of your granny and disabled, whilst they are abused with inadequate service, behind a state wall. And everyone is kept in check by the fear it could happen to them next.

      Its the same in the care courts, the schools and if learning disabled care is now part of the special needs statement.

      Only those rich enough to avoid state care, and those that do whatever state want. will be safe. 1984 arrive without us noticing that was the plan…

      Reply

  3. Thanks Sophie, for your concern and sympathy, it means a lot.

    This will continue to happen because these children can make so much money until the scandal is exposed in the media and now before an election is the time to do it.

    Best wishes to you and your family.

    Finola,

    Reply

    1. Oh I agree it will continue, easy when it can be covered up when all services stick together, they seem too forget that you are a loving mum and family and that your only concern is to do what is best for Issy, you have no hidden agendas she is your daughter. I’m so sorry you are being put through this horrific time, it’s just so unjust.

      Love & best wishes Sophie xxx

      Reply

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