I am in a nightmare.
Issy has been taken. She was no longer in her bedroom.
It hit me. She was gone. I cannot find her.
Worse still, what was happening to her?
What horror was she suffering?
Her pain, unheard.
And, I cannot help her.
She will never be home again.
Could I bear to see her, if they let me?
She is in her bedroom.
Pheww….. I make a coffee, and write this.
It is my one day without the ‘education’ package.
Which, we have had now for three weeks Monday 10-1 , Tuesday 11-1, polished, affable PA of measured lady, who holds our ‘pot of money’,
10-4, 11-4, Monday, Thursday, Friday, with lady sent up from The Lodge ( Issy’s proposed 2 day a week ‘school’), replete with I- pad, keyboard and bubbles.
Lodge Lady is doing an autism MA at Hallam, but has a music degree.
I suspect Issy may be an unpaid placement, but am told she is not.
Neither, were given Issy’s care plan, I managed to force on the measured lady, and, appeared to know nothing about Issy, so all is repeated again.
Despite this, The Lodge lady, asked a string of questions, and, on my becoming exasperated, opened her arms out to give me a hug. ??
All is bizarre, prescribed, and controlled.
Impersonally, too personal.
Issy remains in her room most of the time, has banged the keyboard a few times, and made sparkles on the ipad, and likes being tickled by the Lodge Lady.
After a two week break over Christmas, both returned.
Bizarrely, neither ask about Issy.
The modus operandi of no enquiry, let alone discussion, of Issy ’s health, sleeping, eating, behaviour, as for the previous workers.
Clearly their must be a reason for this.
Yet, on Christmas Eve, the Lodge Lady, unconnected with anything, asked, ‘How do you cut Issy’s hair?’.
Their role and agenda, are unknown.
But, it is clear, they are instructed what to ask, and what not to talk about.
Conversations stop dead, or, are rudely diverted, on certain topics.
If you mention this, as tactfully as possible, faces are attentive, but blank.
And no matter how dire the situation, Issy in bed till late, distressed, up all night, and no respite, the farewells of,
‘Hope you have a nice weekend’, are never customised.
It is now Thursday, the lodge lady arrives.
I now, deliberately, do not mention, anything about Issy.
And again she does not ask.
Issy was in fact, up all night.
In my bedroom light on, for juice once, crackers and cheese twice
Education funding, as stated in Issy’s March ‘education’ report, is available until March 2015, provided parents consent.
We withdrew our misappropriated consent in April, and appear to have no option, but to consent to this latest incarnation, but suspect, the full funding, will still have been claimed, on the back of this latest provision.
Who checks the LA’s accounts?
We have no other support, or respite.
Our social worker rings, her first contact since October.
‘I thought I’d ring to see how things are going?’
‘I am having a meeting with the Measured Lady tomorrow’.
Why, I am not told.
Yet, this lady has my pot of money and employs her worker, supposedly chosen by me , and provides the package by my express consent.
And meets with my social worker.
Behind my back.
I reply, ‘as our social worker, you should know how things are going. As should the Measured Lady, if not, there is no point in you meeting’.
‘I thought, I’d ask you first’.
‘As you should know from the workers, nothing much has changed, Issy still won’t go out’.
‘And I still haven’t heard anything about my complaint’.
She replies, ‘But X has sent you a letter’.
‘Yes, it was not about my complaint’.
‘I can’t comment on that’.
‘As X told you she is concerned about Issy, and why she is not going out’
‘But I didn’t give permission for X to be in my house to observe Issy for intervention issues, but to visit about my complaint. ‘.
The social worker agrees.
’Would Issy be prepared to see a psychologist, to find out, why she is not going out?’
‘How could they achieve this, when no one else has ?’
‘I don’t know I’m not a psychologist.’
‘’The first thing, she’d need to find out is what happened on the days, just before Issy stopped going out. And no one has or is willing to’.
‘It was the education packages push to her ‘independent’ living that caused all this’.
‘Well what do you want for Isabel’s future?’.
‘Surely, by now you must know. I have told you, and everyone often enough. What anyone would want for their very vulnerable daughter, to be at home, cared for and loved by her own family, where she desperately wants to be’.
‘But surely you don’t want her to stay in her bedroom for the rest of her life’.
I am the abuser, keeping Issy, in her bedroom.
I left it, asking our social worker to send a letter from the psychologist, stating the purpose of her visit, her qualifications to fulfil this purpose, and what she intended to do to achieve it, and for the psychologist to be briefed accurately, as we would like to be, on what happened on the days, now 9 months ago, immediately before Issy stopped going out.
I did not receive one.
I also asked why, we hadn’t had a single hour respite from any agency, since October.
She said she hadn’t wanted to disablise Issy, a different excuse from the last, of being unable to find an agency willing to support.